It’s no secret that when partners have different sex drives, it can lead to tension and conflict in the relationship.
But what is less commonly understood is the unique challenges faced by the high-libido partner.
This person may feel rejected and abandoned by their spouse, and may even wonder if there is something wrong with them.
In this post, we will explore some of the challenges faced by the higher-libido partner, as well as ways to manage them.
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Why Exactly Does My Husband Get Mad When I don’t Want Sex?
When it comes to sex, men and women often have very different needs. For many men, sex is a crucial part of their identity and self-esteem.
It can be a way to release stress, feel close to their partner, and affirm their masculinity. As a result, it can be difficult for them to understand why their wife or girlfriend might not be interested in sex.
If a woman is tired, stressed, or simply not in the mood, her husband may interpret this as a personal rejection.
He may feel that he is not attractive or desirable enough for her. This can lead to feelings of insecurity and resentment, which can in turn lead to arguments and conflict.
Of course, this is not always the case. Each couple is different, and it is important to communicate openly about sexual needs and expectations.
But it is worth considering how sex may be impacting your husband’s ego and self-esteem.
If you are not interested in sex, try to find other ways to nurture your relationship and make him feel loved and valued.
This can help to prevent arguments and provide a more positive foundation for your marriage.
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Understand the mindset of your husband
When two people get married, they promise to love and cherish each other for better or for worse.
But what happens when one spouse suddenly has a change of heart when it comes to sex? For the higher-libido husband, this can be a frustrating and confusing experience.
After all, you thought you were on the same page when it came to your sexual needs and desires. But now your spouse is no longer interested in sex, leaving you feeling sexually frustrated and unfulfilled.
Of course, this isn’t to say that there’s anything wrong with having a lower sex drive. But if you’re the one who is suddenly feeling left out in the cold (Read: why she suddenly giving me the cold shoulder), it can be difficult to know how to react.
After all, you don’t want to pressure your spouse into something they’re not comfortable with. But at the same time, you also don’t want to give up on your own sexual needs and desires.
It’s a delicate balance, but hopefully, with some understanding and communication, you and your spouse can find a way to move forward that works for both of you.
The difference Between The High Vs Low Libido in a Marriage
When one partner in a marriage has a higher libido than the other, it can often lead to feelings of frustration and insecurity.
If sex is not happening as frequently as the higher-libido partner would like, they may feel rejected or undesirable.
In some cases, this may even lead to them seeking out sexual gratification outside of the relationship.
On the other hand, the partner with the lower libido may feel Pressure to have sex more often than they are comfortable with, leading to further tension and resentment.
Ultimately, a lack of communication and understanding can be damaging to a marriage when there is a disparity in sexual desire between partners.
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7 Things to Do When you have No Sex Drive and Your Husband is Mad
1. Talk about your feelings openly and honestly
While a low sex drive can be caused by various factors, such as stress or medication, it can also be a normal part of the aging process.
If you find that your libido has decreased and you no longer want to have sex with your husband, it’s important to communicate openly and honestly with him about your feelings.
Describing how you’re feeling and explaining what you need from him can help to create a more satisfying sexual relationship.
Additionally, it’s important to keep in mind that your sex drive may fluctuate over time. Just because you’re not interested in sex now doesn’t mean that you won’t feel differently in the future.
With open communication and a willingness to experiment, you and your husband can find ways to maintain a fulfilling sexual relationship.
2. Seek professional help if you need it
Seeking professional help can be a difficult decision, but it may be the best decision if you find yourself in a situation where you no longer want to have sex with your husband.
Low sex drive can be caused by a variety of factors, and a professional will be able to help you identify the root cause of your problem.
In some cases, low sex drive can be treated with medication or therapy.
However, even if treatment is not an option, a professional can still provide you with support and guidance as you work through this difficult period in your marriage.
If you are struggling with your sexual relationship, do not hesitate to seek out professional help. It could be the best decision you ever make.
3. Don’t take out your frustrations on your husband
When your sex drive starts to wane, it can be easy to take your frustration out on your husband. Maybe you start to nitpick his every little move or find yourself snapping at him for no reason.
However, it’s important to remember that your low sex drive is not your husband’s fault. In fact, he is likely just as frustrated as you are.
Instead of lashing out, try to open up a dialogue about your concerns. This will help you to communicate better and could ultimately lead to a solution that works for both of you.
So don’t take out your frustrations on your husband when you’re struggling with a low sex drive – it’s not fair to him, and it’s not going to solve the problem.
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4. Rediscover old interests together
When your sex drive starts to fade, it can be difficult to know how to reconnect with your partner.
However, there are a number of things you can do to reignite the spark. First, try rediscovering an old interest together.
Whether it’s a hobby you used to enjoy or a place you used to love to go, shared experiences can help you feel closer to each other.
Additionally, make time for physical affection, even if you’re not ready for sex. Hold hands, give each other massages, or simply cuddle on the couch.
These small gestures can help increase intimacy and make you both feel desired. Finally, be honest about your needs and wants.
If you’re feeling disconnected from your partner, let them know and explain what would help you feel closer. With a little effort, you can rekindle the passion in your relationship.
5. Communicate with your husband about what you like and don’t like in bed
If you’re not in the mood for sex, it can be hard to find the words to explain why to your husband.
After all, you don’t want to hurt his feelings or make him feel like he’s not attractive to you. However, communication is key in any relationship, and that includes your sexual relationship.
If you’re honest with your husband about what you like and don’t like in bed, it can help to improve your sex life.
For example, if you’re not a fan of deep kissing, let him know. Or, if you prefer a certain position, let him know that, too.
The more open you are with your husband about your needs, the more likely he is to be able to please you. As a result, you may find yourself getting in the mood for sex more often.
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6. Make time for sex, even if you’re not in the mood
Though it may not seem like it, sex is important even when you no longer want to have sex with your husband because of your low sex drive.
For one, sex helps to maintain the physical closeness that is so vital to a happy and healthy marriage.
In addition, regular sexual activity can help to increase levels of the bonding hormone oxytocin, which can help to create a sense of emotional closeness.
Finally, certain sexual activities can help to release tension and stress, providing a much-needed respite from the demands of daily life.
Though it may take some effort, making time for sex is important for maintaining a strong and intimate relationship with your husband.
7. Find new ways to connect with your husband
It can be difficult to maintain a close relationship with your husband when you’re not interested in having sex. You may feel like you’re failing as a wife, or like there’s something wrong with you.
However, it’s important to remember that your sex drive is not a reflection of your love for your husband.
There are many reasons why your libido may have decreased, including stress, fatigue, hormonal changes, and medications.
If you’re struggling with a low sex drive, talk to your doctor to see if there are any medical solutions that can help.
In the meantime, there are plenty of other ways to connect with your husband. Spend time talking, cuddling, and doing physical activity together.
Express your love in words, and find creative ways to show affection. By staying connected to your husband in other ways, you can maintain a strong relationship even if your sex life is on hold.
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Ways to Boost Your Sex Drive, and Improve your Low Libido
Any woman can attest to the fact that there are a million things vying for our attention (read: Tired of Begging For Attention) on any given day.
Between work, family, and social obligations, it’s easy to let our sex lives fall by the wayside.
A low libido can be a major challenge in a marriage, but there are ways to get your sex drive back on track. If you’re struggling with a low libido, try these 7 tips:
1. Talk to your doctor. There could be a medical reason for your low libido, so it’s important to rule that out first.
2. Make time for sex. If you’re always tired or stressed, it’s no wonder you don’t feel like having sex. Make an effort to schedule some time each week for intimacy with your husband.
3. Be more spontaneous. Part of the reason you may not be in the mood is because sex has become routine. To increase your desire, try being more spontaneous and unpredictable with your husband.
4. Get in shape. Exercise releases endorphins, which can help increase your sexual desire. Plus, feeling good about yourself will make you more likely to want to have sex.
5. Try something new. Trying new things in the bedroom can also help increase your interest in sex. Talk to your husband about trying something new, whether it’s a new position or toy.
6. Make time for yourself outside of the home. Take a yoga class, get a massage, or read a steamy romance novel. Rediscover your own sexuality separate from your husband.
7. Plan date nights with your husband where the sole focus is on enjoying each other’s company and intimacy. This can help to reignite the spark in your relationship.
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